Sorry does not make a dead man alive

"Sorry man, I was really busy to come and meet you when you were sick."

"Sorry for being mean to you. I was in a bad mood."

"Sorry for lying to you. I won't do it again."

Have you ever heard this before? Have you ever done this to somebody before? Yes you have and in fact, we all have. Nobody is perfect and everyone makes mistakes. We all apologise but how many of our apologies are true. Take two friends. One of them puts the other down at every social gathering in front of a lot of people. He always apologises privately to him but the behaviour continues and he keeps insulting him. Are his apologies true? Is he not considerate of his friend's feelings?

Take a mother and her son. The mother tells the son to clean his room while she is out to buy some house wares. When she comes back, the room is as dirty as ever. The son apologises with a simple 'sorry'. The mother forgives him and the next day tells him clean his room when she goes out to meet some friends. When she comes back the room is again, as dirty as ever. The son says 'sorry'. The mother forgives him. This keeps happening and the son keeps saying 'sorry' and the mother keeps forgiving him. Are the son's apologies real? Does he mean it? No, but as a mother, she always forgives him because she is his mother and mothers can never stay angry at their children.
However, not everyone is your mother. You only have that on person who will always forgive you no matter what.
If you were to buy something your friend asked you on repeated reminders and you forgot, she or he would never forgive you.

'Sorry' is and empty word with no meaning. To elaborate on the title, if I kill a man and tell his dead body sorry for killing him, even if it was a mistake, there is no way that he can ever come back to life. Once you commit something, you can't change it.

99% of the times when somebody says sorry, he or she never means it. They just use it as an excuse to keep the person off their backs. How many times has somebody hurt you and said sorry but 'never learnt from their mistake' and hurt you again?

Don't think that saying sorry will justify your actions because it won't. There is a reason why teachers don't accept 'sorry' anymore because they know how empty the word is. Students yet talk, they yet shout, they yet eat in class and cover it up by 'sorry'.

'Sorry' is responsible for a lot of friendships to dissolve when the person does something bad and just says sorry. Nobody ever believes it because they know that you will keep doing it again and again.

"Sorry" "No, you can't be because you knew the consequences of your actions and you yet put yourself in that predicament."

My advice to you is stop saying 'sorry'. Instead, when you make a mistake, make up for it. Try your best to change your actions and if you can't do that then do not do the action in the first place. Your friend, relative or whoever will understand that you dont want to risk anything. before doing something, or before saying 'sorry' especially put yourself into that person's shoes. Think of the problem from their point of view. Most of all, actually repent on what you did to cause the problem. Don't depend on apologies to save you because they won't. Insulting, lying, teasing or talking behind the back are one of the main reasons to say 'sorry' and they are the main reasons as to why friendships break. Words are like bullets. Once shot they can't come back. You have already used it.

Teaching a Garden to Weed Itself

Teaching a garden to weed itself basically means to get rid of everything bad and useless by making them go away on their own without you hassling into the matter. it can also mean tricking the guilty into revealing themselves.

king Solomon was the king of Israel renowned for his wisdom, honesty and wit.

One day, two women came to him holding a baby. Lets take the first one as woman A and the second as woman B. Woman A claimed that she was sleeping with her baby one night when woman B's baby died in woman B's arms who was also sleeping. Woman B arose from midnight and took woman A's baby for woman A. However, woman B denied this story and claimed the living baby hers and the dead baby the other woman's. One woman was blatantly lying ad the other was the true mother. So what to do?

King Solomon asked his courtier to fetch him a sword. He picked up the live baby and said that since there was no solid evidence of the baby being anybody's, the best way to solve the dispute was to cut the baby in half.

Woman A cried out saying,"Do not hurt the baby. It is better to let woman B keep the baby than to let it perish."

Woman B said," This is fair, king. Cut the baby. It shall neither be mine nor thine."

King Solomon awarded the baby to woman A. 

How did Solomon know the true mother? He reasoned that a cruel woman would go along with the baby-citing plan and the true mother would rather let go of the baby than to see it get cut.

Zappos was an unorthodox online shoe company who knew how to teach the garden to weed itself.

After hiring new recruits, Zappos offered them a chance to quit and also told them that they would get awarded $2000 for quitting and never coming back. Why? Think about it.

This offer gave the new employees to quit and it basically put them in a position of "Do you really care for the money or the job?" 

The CEO of Zappos, Tony Heish, figured that anybody who'd easily take the money would cost Zappos a lot more in the long run in terms of money, productivity and morale.

A person who is lying or cheating will always respond to a situation differently, like woman B or the employees who grabbed the $2000. To be successful or sift the guilty from the innocent when nobody steps forward to appeal their guilt, one must think of an incentive perfect for this. 'Pooling equilibrium' is a term used in economy for this.

So think. Open your mind. Don't be afraid to try out new things... after all thats what zappos taught the world. 

Acknowledgements: 'Think Like a Freak' Steven D. Levitt and Stephen J. Dubner. 

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The Three Hardest Words in the English Language

Take a survey of 100 people. Ask them all what are the three hardest words in English. 99 of them will say ''I love you''. But no. thats not it. One person out of the hundred will say 'I don't know'.

Believe it or not, ''I don't know'' are the three hardest words in English. Have you ever heard people say that anywhere apart from maths? no.
the real reason as to why these are the hardest words to say is because people's egos are huge, larger than what they think they are. people are afraid to say that they don't know something. They feel that if they say ''I don't know'' then they will be laughed upon, teased and ostracised. Whenever in doubt about knowing something, people will make up stuff. They will probably make up a large chunk of nonsense which is 'supposedly' related to the pertinent question at hand.

There are known knowns; There are things we know we know. We also know there are known unknowns; That is to say we know there are some things we do not know.

So, if we know that there is a something we do not know, why say something which you might think that is related to the topic but is actually not. You will make a fool of yourself and also lead people into the wrong direction.
As Mark Twain said,"It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak and remove all doubt."

Saying nonsense can also lead to negative aspects and making people call you a liar. Remember, there is no such thing as a small lie. 

Worst of all, don't make predictions. They almost never work out. if I had a rupee for every time my friends told me that they expect a certain mark in an examination, my house would be taller than Antilla.
Predictions are a fad. There was this one person who, who if you remember, predicted that the world would end on 21 December, 2012. Haha funny.
There is a word for this kind behaviour of predictions and false knowledge 
Ultracrepidarianism. it means- the habitat giving opinions and advice out of your knowledge or competence. 
if you don't know something, go ahead and say "I don't know". it helps. back it up by saying but maybe I can find out. and do find out. you have no clue how receptive people are to honesty. Lying won't solve anything but then again, don't think of your actions as a white lie... because if you've seen certain movies, then lying can snowball into a huge thing.
So I ask you, stop saying things about the future and its events. because if you claim that it will happen, I ask you to kill yourself and resurrect yourself two days later.

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Why Eminem makes us live differently

"you only get one shot, do not miss your chance to go. this opportunity comes once in a lifetime"
 (lose yourself)
"success is my only mother******* option, failure's not" (lose yourself)
"you picked me up, breathed new life in me, I owe my life to you" (I need a doctor)
"why be a king, when you can be a god?" (rap god)
"you don't get another chance. life is no Nintendo game" (love the way you lie. pt.1)
"thanks cuz your hate is what gave me this strength." (lighters)
"don't let them say you ain't beautiful. they can all get ****** up, just stay true to you" (beautiful)

do you recognise these lines? you might not if you aren't a die-hard Eminem fan. but I'm sure you get the essence of it.
people think Eminem just raps angrily to get a point across but in reality, he res about his life- his own divorce stricken life.
the thing about Eminem that strikes me the most is that he has literally seen it all and he has taken it and has coped with and and lived on to be great.
Eminem's real name is Marshall Mathers III. his father left him and his music mentor committed suicide. his mother married somebody his age to support her son and daughter. later, he got married.
in 1999, his mother sued him for 10 million dollars for insulting her in a song. he was divorced twice with his wife who also sued him later.
he was arrested and convicted several times due to drugs and assault and went to rehab and through depression
so yeah, he has been through it all.
whats inspiring here is that he yet stepped up to the problems in his life. he was challenged by everybody and he beat them in their own game. he rapped about his drug problems early in his career and soon he started rapping about his life.

today Eminem stands to sell 172 million albums.

so what does Eminem teach me?
Eminem teaches me... and everyone else to step up and look at fate in the eye and say," I make my own fate." his life is the clear definition of hard work...which my classmates would know well bout when they heard my speech on it. but why didn't he give up? because, simply because he wanted to do something in life. he wanted to show the world -" Ima be what I set out to be. without a doubt undoubtedly and all those who look down at me, I'm tearing down your balcony." (not afraid)
so... if you ever feel like letting go, giving up or just accepting failure, alway remember.. there was this one guy who one guy who went to tartarus, spat on failure's face and became the biggest thing in the world. an icon. a god.

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public speaking- a pain in the ass

"his palms are sweaty,
knees weak
arms are heavy
there's vomit on his sweater already
mom's spaghetti he's nervous."
                       –Eminem

according to me, public speaking is dangerous play. I was never good at it nor will I ever be good at it. whenever I go up to speak, my knees shake and my palms sweat... much like jimmy smith Jr who Eminem raps about in 'lose yourself'. but what makes us so disturbed? is it the fear of screwing up or is it the fear of looking at people who are staring back at you...
recently.. around a week ago, I had my English oral assignment. it was for my ICSE board. my topic was whether I believe in miracles or not. I was facing the entire class. not much of a big deal as I was used to addressing auditoriums filled with thousands of people but I yet felt shaky. there was a catch in my throat. when I opened my mouth to speak I began stuttering. I thought... why? why is this happening? then I realised that normally I would be addressing people who I don't know and embedding the first impression is the most important. but here , I was up against my friends. I already had embedded my first impression on them and so, I could speak with my mind. the rest of the assignment went off smoothly.
so, according to me, always speak in front of people you know. trust me, its better. a lot of people praise me for my speaking skills and power speak extemporary. however... its because I feel everybody is my friend and everybody listens to me.
so.... to end up.. I say that one must be familiar to the speakers he is speaking to. if not...try assuming a familiar background for it helps a lot and you can achieve miracles..